Transition ≠ Sacrifice

crossroads

Transition means very different things for different people. One thing is for sure: it´s a ritual of passage, a point of no return – once you decide that this is for you, you´ve taken a step in seven league boots*. From that point on, life´ll be sort of divided; the history you had in the body you were born with, and the history you are about to create.  To some extent it´s about making a sacrifice.

From the Latin sacer and facere, sacrificum involves an offer to God (or the Gods), which can be done just to humor them or to ask for a chance to create something new. In any case, the nature of the act requires a serious degree of faithfulness or devotion, without which the reciprocity of the agreement might become void. If you don´t hold yourself to it, you might as well not sacrifice anything.

Often when I look around me, I see transgender identified people go through something similar. They are ready to give up for a higher good. But what do they give up, and to whom exactly, and is it always worth it? The argument I´ve been hearing is that if you want to transition, you have to follow the established rules, and no matter the torment that they might put you through, in the end all of that is totally worth it.

Shoulder the burden and carry your cross, because you´re doing it for your own happiness. But who says that future happiness holds more value than happiness in this moment, even happiness while transitioning? Is transition really about sacrifice and suffering? In my mind, my being satisfied now is equally important as any future I might have. I won´t set aside my entitlement for a team of ´experts´.

I´m not about to be humbled by the fact that I belong to a small portion of society, to which care simply isn´t fully geared yet. Gender professionals, most often cisgender, do not know more about my identity than I do; and they are not my path to ultimate happiness. I appreciate their readiness to help, but if the “help” leads to feelings of inadequacy… count me out.

*Seven league boots are an element of European folklore. The boot allows the person wearing them to take strides of seven leagues per step, resulting in great speed. The boots are often presented by a magical character to the protagonist to aid in the completion of a significant task (Wikipedia).

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6 thoughts on “Transition ≠ Sacrifice

  1. I would love it if you’d be a guest on my podcast. It’s called The Transamorous Network Podcast and is part of (duh) The Transamorous Network. You can hear episodes of the show on iTunes or SoundCloud. Here are the links:

    https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/transamorous-network-podcast/id1107479227

    Your story, particularly what you wrote here, is something our listeners would love to hear. If you’re interested please write me back and let’s chat about particulars. Thanks!

    Like

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