Not long ago, I got an email from my aunt saying she worried about my plans for surgery. She wanted to make sure that I´d be getting surgery for the right reasons, because I had sounded very spiteful in addressing my own anatomy. She described how she had felt incredibly angry and hateful of her own uterus for a while and how she had fantasized about getting it removed.
The relationship between women and uteruses is a difficult one, I think, and apparent that you realize that women´s emotions have often been linked to irrationality. This link was made official in the now obsolete and erratic diagnosis of hysteria (1990 BCE, from Rational Wiki), which stated that violent outbursts and anxiety were related to the uterus (which translates to hysteria in Greek).
In Christian Medieval Europe, hysteria was linked to witchcraft – the result of demonic possession – and it was generally assumed that it could be cured with sex or masturbation. While hysteria was removed as a diagnosis in 1980 (source here), it can´t be denied that women are still seen as going through a temporary crazy phase especially in relation to a drop in hormone levels (PMS).
Hormone levels impact our neurotransmitters (I experienced this on my first three days on testosterone and one day after shark week: I was ecstatic) and therefore our mood, but to this day there is no exact scientific cause known for this anxiety, and if you dare think outside the box, there might be a gazillion other reasons (unprocessed emotions from the past, for example).
Personally I think that women who go through this are both deeply confused by it (it completely alters your way of perceiving the world and emotional response) and experience severe guilt because of it. Our society is built upon intellectual and rational heritage, and intense emotions or mental illnesses that cause emotional dis-ease tend to still be frowned upon or misunderstood.
In this light it doesn´t surprise me that many ciswomen could possibily experience strong dysphoria as well and even temporarily hate parts of their body, and I guess my aunt was correct in worrying about my motives. Before I came in touch with people who are transgender or even transgenderism itself as a real thing, I actually attributed a lot of this hate to the same thing. More about that in my next post.