Regular Gay


The opinions we inherit from parents, the environment that we grew up in, the internet (new to those of us who witnessed modem evolution) influence how we see the world. The fact that I was not even familiar with the existence of transgender men until 2015, attests to this fact.

Considering that I got all my information about trans women from television (sitcoms in particular), and they were mostly represented as weird outcasts, it´s hardly surprising that I never made any attempts to go beyond this  empty representation, and do some research of my own. I just enjoyed the show, and forgot about it.

This hardly applies to transgender issues alone. We are bombarded on a daily basis with information, and fed the most eccentric and glamorous pieces of news, so we´ll consume some more. The more far-fetched and fantastic, the more glamorous and alternative, the better. This is great, because it provides recognition in society.

The downside of so much glitter and glamour is that your average, super-boring stories of gender nonconforming, asexual, bisexual, and whatever-sexual people, are never being heard. It is still a big deal to come out of the closet, and when you do, you find yourself wondering if people will view you in a different light.

I for one prefer not to associate myself much with labels. Not queer, not gay, not straight, not completely asexual, not completely mono-amorous, not into this or that scene. Not staying at the YMCA and also not drifting along the canals of Amsterdam during Pride Parade. I don´t feel a need to do any of those things.

Do you want to associate with labels because they make you feel more at home, because they describe you, or help you get recognition? Do you prefer to carry a handbag, or mascara? No problem!  The point is the diversity, not just televised and advertised diversity, but the one that is expressed by all of us, regular people.


4 thoughts on “Regular Gay

  1. Bloody sitcoms have made a mockery of trans-women for as long as I can remember. To me, it always comes off like fetishism. There’s always *that one guy* who falls in love, unbeknownst to him that the woman is trans. Then all his friends need to convince him otherwise and hilarity ensues. It’s so disrespectful and shitty. Ugh. Such shite. When that happens in the real world, trans-women get hurt. But yeah, for the most part, we’re just normal ol’ boring everyday people. Nobody cares about that though. lol!


      1. Yeah true enough. I do love watching old reruns of Ellen DeGeneres’s sitcom. It was awesome and funny and represented as true a perspective of what being gay would be like. My favourite episode was the one where she comes out to her friends and they all offer her their support… and then promptly start handing each other money in regards to who won the secret bet. 😀

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Doctor Who sometimes shows gay or bisexual people in a really casual way. It’s never the defining trait of any character, but it’s part of them nontheless (e.g. captain Jack Harkness). Also, on Game of Thrones I really liked prince Oberyn. The character is bisexual, and also ultimately cool. In his case his sexuality is definitely a defining trait though. As actor Pedro Pascal explains: “The Red Viper enjoys life. He does not discriminate in his pleasures. This is the way he understands life, to live it to its fullest. And to limit yourself in terms of experience doesn’t make any sense to him — what’s beautiful is beautiful. But there are more examples: The Walking Dead features a really cool lesbian character and a gay couple which is spared the standard stereotypical portrayal. Also, I’m dying to talk about Black Sails but I can’t without giving major plot spoilers, and I don’t know if you have seen the show yet. I agree that most gay characters on TV are extremely stereotypical (like in every single sitcom or supposedly funny drama shows such as Modern Family), and bisexual characters rarely exist (well, not male bisexuals anyway), but I really think with a new generation of higher quality series, things are changing for the better!

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