So I told you that I am trying to “beat the system”, at least where gender is concerned. I have refused, for two and a half years, to comply with regular methods of transition. That is not to say I haven´t tried. Because I have tried, really hard. I have discussed my ideals with four different gender therapists.
Nowhere lane, though. So I looked around and networked with other transmen and women who opted for unconventional ways to transition. Some of the guys had managed to get top surgery without getting an okay from a gender team. Specifically, with one surgeon who does not believe that rigid protocols are needed in order to transition.
So I wrote her. I explained my situation, and then I had my therapist write her, who has been wonderful throughout the entire process. I went for an intake, they took a look at my chest, took some pictures, I had my talk with the anesthesiologist, all my blood checks done, the stuff you need to get ready for the surgery.
So to tell you the truth, I thought I was good. Now I just needed confirmation that I would be put on the waiting list. Instead, I got a phone call from the surgeons´ assistant, telling me that a diagnosis from my therapist was not enough, because she was not a psychiatrist or a psychologist. Apparently only they know if you have dysphoria. Or not.
The phone call, for a while, had me reel on the verge of a suicide attempt. Immediately afterwards I went to my friends on Facebook, the ones who are transitioning in unconventional ways. They told me the situation was very strange. There were a few among them who had had no diagnosis at all, and even they had had top surgery.
I wrote my therapist, who was kind of angry at the entire situation too. She did not understand why her recommendation (for me to get top surgery) was being rejected as invalid, and also why I could not get a second opinion from the psychiatrist who works at the hospital where I would be operated. Once again, I called the surgeons´ office.
The assistant said she would discuss my situation with the surgeon. See what she thought. Unfortunately, they haven´t called back yet. When I called again today, I was told that the plastic surgery department was moving to another office, so I would have to try and reach them later. So much for having an uncomplicated transition.